If you need an animal removed, don’t try to do it yourself. Instead, contact ACME Animal Control. You don’t know what a cornered armadillo is capable of, trust me.
Removal of Animals by ACME Animal Control
For the last time, no we will not remove your husband. Yes, we know that at a place like ACME Animal Control in Norfolk, Virginia, we are experts in animal removal, but even if your husband is an obnoxious pig, we can not remove him. We are aware that our title should be a bit more specific, and our legal team is working on that right now. In the mean time, I suggest that you try someone who specializes in bipedal removal. What, you are also being terrorized by an ostrich. Scratch that advice too.
Animal and Wildlife Management with ACME Animal Control
Sometimes it’s the cutest animals that you have to look out for. Just last week a pack of wild squirrels overtook a weapons manufacturer, causing all kinds of furry fury. If it wasn’t for the experts in animal management at a place like ACME Animal Control in Norfolk, Virginia, we might all be bowing down to Twiggy the Water Skiing Squirrel. A squirrel that can water ski and fire a semi-automatic, terrifying!
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