Chicago Artists: Find, Rate, or Review Artists in Chicago, ready to hire. Trained Chicago Artists are on call, ready to create for you a masterpiece. They can paint, sculpt, mime, or paint. Chicago Artists can be commissioned to do anything, from a portrait of you, to a sculpture of you.Chicago artists are poor. I mean, really poor. Unless you live in a specific area of San Francisco, or Fremont, no one is going to pay a Chicago artist anything for anything. Did you know Greek word for “artist” is “kallitechnis”, which literally translates to “worthless individual, who is good for nothing other than putting paint on canvas”? Seriously. You can look it up.
To be fair, Chicago artists are good at what they do. Except for those “abstract” artists. None of them wanted to be abstract artists to begin with, but then they tried to paint or sculpt like a normal person and failed miserably. They showed their friends what they just drew and they responded with “What the hell is that?” And out of self-preservation, they responded “It’s abstract. Can’t you tell?” Then there was some nervous laughter.
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Chicago Artists